Friday, October 31, 2008

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

What does it make me if I'm fooled more than a hundred times...by the same person.

Remember how I mentioned that H and I are on speaking terms today? Well...

The day started off with me texting everyone a Halloween song. A few replies I got were cheerful, and then I got a texts from Bre.

Why on earth am I so annoyed by her? My conversations with her are normal, yet every word she says makes me angry. I went to school upset.

In math I handed out chocolate to those around me. The girl in front of me passed on a chocolate to Maryna, who took it happily. When she found out it was from me, she threw it on the floor.

By then my patience was on the edge. I ignored everyone and focused on not lashing out.

In social I made an extra big effort to be happy. It worked. It was around this time that I received a text from H telling me she was going to skip forth period so we could hang out together. I got directions to her locker and was told what time to meet her.

So the day passed, until it was finally 2pm.

I went to my locker, and then made my way towards hers.

Nothing. I texted her and got no reply.

By then I had missed my bus and had no choice but to wait for the 3:30pm bus-eighty minutes later. Thankfully I found a girl at the mall who was in a similar situation as me.

Still, I was upset at myself and quite humiliated.

H has always done this to me, and every time I forgive her. Enough is enough. No way am I going to be paying her much attention.

I went to work sad and angry.

The rest of the evening was fun, filled up many laughs. At the end of the night, a guy I've been casually flirting with called me over. He handed me over a piece of paper which said: Call me tomorrow at 9pm.

His house number was on there.

Here's the deal with this guy: he's my "friend's" ex boyfriend. He's the guy who was interested in me while he was with her. He is cute. And I might like him.

I'm super nervous. We work together tomorrow. I'm thinking of giving him a note telling him to call me. Why should I be the nervous wreck, right?

Still, I'm not good with guys. I get nervous and clammy. I'll ruin this before it even starts.

Dear lord, please let something happen. Something good.

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